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Thursday, June 6, 2013

Big Brother Reading Our eMail ... Who Woulda Thunk It?

I wrote this short story back in 2009.  I never did anything with it until now.  In light of the news headlines and activity with Verizon, I thought I would share this unedited short story!  Enjoy it, but remember...This is my work and you can link to it, but please do not copy it.


deTEXTives

513-555-8754:  OMGYG2BK ##
859-555-7732:  HONEST TO GOD, SHE WAS BUCK NAKED ##
513-555-8754:  IN THE BOARD ROOM?  I SO WISH I WAS THERE. ##
315-555-0213:  CARRY ON BOYS, I HAVE TO GO.  TATA.  ##

It was now almost 7:30 PM and Brendan Parker was ready for his lunch break.  Brendan was a junior systems administrator at Verizon.  He worked at a non-descript building just outside of Utica New York.  He along with a group of sixty employees were the people who kept the Verizon texting service up and running for over twenty-five million US customers.  This is a twenty-four hour, seven day a week operation.  Brendan is twenty-six years old, and lives just outside of Utica, near the old Utica Club brewery, along with Janice Fanelli another junior administrator.  Janice is a small and attractive young woman with auburn hair and an ashen complexion.  She is a year older than Brendan.  Their living together was merely a financial necessity.

The only fringe benefit of the job from Brendan’s point of view were those times when things went smoothly and he got a chance to read through some of the racier text messages that were stored at the Verizon datacenters located in ten cities throughout the country.  The snippet above was one of six thousand lines of text messages from the headquarters of Fifth Third Bank in Cincinnati that were sent via company Blackberries just yesterday.  Brendan peered at his computer through his trendy black rimmed glasses and continued to format a report requested by Fifth Third.  They wanted to know the volume of text messages being sent by their employees.  Most people who use Verizon texting service do not realize that for billing purposes, Verizon captures and records every text messages sent through their service.  There is a gigantic data base that stores these messages.  Those millions of messages are kept for six months.  A group of very smart developers and database administrators have created search engines and tools to help Verizon text administrators like Brendan and Janice help the accounting team with any special billing inquiries.

Even the savvy CIO’s at banks like Fifth Third Bank did not realize the wealth of information hidden in the midst of the senseless drivel that are the make-up of most text messaging exchanges.  Of course, Homeland Security is fully aware and although Brendan cannot confirm this, he is absolutely sure that federal agency has full access to the entire texting database and more than likely keeps more than six months of texting history in its databases.   But Brendan’s thoughts at this moment were on what was that woman doing naked in the Board Room and what did she look like?

At the end of the day shift and start of the evening shift, Edna Woodward had scheduled a meeting of all administrators.  Edna was a true blue Verizon lifer.  She had gray hair, small stature and is a high energy fireball. Edna is not what most of the young admins imagined for the director of the operation.  But that is what she was.  This was not a regularly scheduled meeting and it is very usual for meeting to span across work shifts.  Brendan hoped he wasn’t about to get laid off.  He was still at least six months from climbing out of the credit card debt he created for himself the first eighteen months after graduating from SUNY at Binghamton.  Brendan’s curly red hair and freckled face belied his willingness to support a local bookie during the end of his college days and his first year of work at Verizon.  He needed his job.
At 8:05 Am Edna convened the meeting in the drab, windowless conference room, “Please people, lighten up!  I called you all together to help me find out why our service has been running slow at times over the past six weeks.” 
The large Smart Board at the front of the room came alive and there was a graph showing small dips in the average transmission time for text messages starting the third week of April.  The changes in times were in milliseconds.  These delays were not ones that could be detected by individual users.  But to big providers like Verizon, they are troublesome.  Edna continued, “As you can see this is not a critical issue, but there is some industry buzz that one day in May, the AT&T texting service was down for one hour and the cause was not a ‘network’ failure as the Bell Boys reported to the press.  We do not want our service to be down for even a few minutes.”
 
A hand went up near the back of the room.  It was Dharmesh Patel who is by far the nerdiest of this room filled with card carrying, certified nerds. 

“Miz Woodward, you point to several places on the chart where there are ten to twenty minutes of time with delays, but it appears that there is a consistent delay every day between 1:00 AM and 2:59 AM.  Is that not more of a concern?” 
Edna quickly replied, “The delays at those times are a know anomaly.  That period of time is not a concern to you or me.  Is that clear?  What I need now is your awareness of the issue.  Please log any work you are doing that touches our database servers.  Keep track of any inquires you run against the database.  We have to make certain we are not the cause of the problem.  That is all, sorry for keeping some of you past your shift.”

As the group filed out of the room, Edna added, “Brendan and Dharmesh, can you come to my office for a few minutes.” 
Brendan paled and thought once again about being fired.  Geez.  But surely they cannot let Dharmesh go.  Edna settled down behind her desk.  She was one of only three people in the group with an office.  The rest of the team is all assigned identical six foot by six foot cubicles.  She motioned to Brendan and Dharmesh to sit down across from her.  Edna’s black eyes darted back and forth between her two administrators and finally began, “This is a serious situation.  I want the two of you and Sandy Blumberg of the afternoon shift to resolve this issue.  I will rearrange your work schedules to free up time for you to work on the problem.  I already had the developers write some artificial intelligence programs that will help you search the database for possible misuse.  Brendan, I want you to take on the responsibility of coordinating the work and keeping me informed about any progress you are making.  Your work on this project is between the four of us.  I will speak to Sandra at the end of her shift.  Brendan please report to my office when you come in tomorrow and join me when I speak to Sandra.”

Brendan was glad to be back in his shared apartment.  Janice, who worked the afternoon shift along with Sandy, was still asleep in her bedroom.  He was dying to tell her about the meeting and his new assignment.  Brendan reflected, what am I thinking? Telling Janice is probably not a good career building decision and by the time he heard movement in Janice’s bedroom and finally the rush of shower water in the bathroom, he had come to terms with the fact that this is one work situation that he could not share with his roommate.  Brendan was apprehensive about working with Dharmesh.  He was so smart but was even more naive.  He was certain Edna asked him to work on this project only because she knew Dharmesh needed a babysitter.  Sandra Blumberg is another situation.  Brendan would love to have to babysit Sandy.  He has had a crush on Sandy since she started work last July after her graduation from RIT.  Sandy is a friend of Janice and has even been to the apartment a few times to meet Janice before they went out together.  Both are by far the best looking nerds at Verizon.  Sandy is tall and slim with long blond hair.  Her age is very hard to pin down.  Sandy could pass as a high school sophomore or as an extremely attractive soccer Mom depending on how she arranged her hair and applied her makeup.  In fact, when Brendan was reading the Board Room text message earlier in the day, the naked body he envisioned was the one he imagined was under the jeans and halter top he had seen Sandy wearing when she was at the apartment two weekends ago.  Brendan thought Edna could not have picked two people that would be harder for Brendan to ‘manage’ than Dharmesh and Sandy.  One is much too smart and the other much too sexy.

Brendan arrived at Edna’s office at 11:45PM Thursday night.  Sandy was not there yet and Edna took this opportunity to share some additional information with Brendan.  “You have done good work these past few months.  I am considering you for a senior administrator position that was recently authorized and funded for our department.  If you can handle the extra responsibilities of the assignment and provide the team leadership required, I will have no problem putting this promotion in motion.  I hope this is just the extra motivation you need to resolve the sensitive problem we are facing.” 
Little did Edna know that for Brendan, just not being fired was as motivated as he needed to be. 

Brendan asked, “With all the work Verizon has done with its firewalls and the periodic verification of their security, how would someone from the outside be tinkering with our database servers?” 

Edna continued to look down at the paper work on her desk and then raised her head to look directly at Brendan, “Did I say the problem was coming from outside the firewall?  You must keep an open mind if you are going to be successful.  Perhaps I am the perpetrator.”  Brendan forced a chuckle, but immediately knew that the work he and his team were about to undertake, might not make them the most popular kids on the block.

There was a knock on the office door and Edna cried out, “Come on in.” 

Brendan’s heart skipped a beat.  He was thinking how fortunate he was that he worked a different shift than Sandy.  With her in any adjacent cubicle, he imagined his work ethics would dissolve to mush.  Edna filled in Sandy with the objectives of the team and again stressed the confidentiality of the work.  In less than twenty minutes Sandy was going home and Brendan was starting a new work day.

The following day Brendan spent the first two hours of his shift thinking of ways to attack the problem at hand.  How to use the assets he had, the immensely intelligent Dharmesh and captivating Sandra, was the first task he tackled.   He decided he would assign Dharmesh to review and try to determine any patterns in the anomalies that they saw on the Smart Board yesterday.  He knew he did not have to give Dharmesh much direction in the endeavor.  He was confident that within a couple of days, he will know more about any relationship between the periods where the texting service was slowing down than he wanted to know.  Dharmesh was thorough and tenacious.  He will ask Sandy to review and start to work with the artificial intelligence algorithms Edna made available to the team.  Having some experience with the tools prior to Dharmesh recommending where to apply them was necessary preparation.  Brendan reserved an activity for himself.  Part of that reservation was very selfish and had been one of his secret desires for months and months.  Brendan also decided that the team needed a place to meet that was outside of their Verizon facility and one where their anonymity was more or less assured.  Such a place existed for Brendan.  The old Utica Club brewery made famous by their singing and dancing steins, Schultz and Dooley, was back in the macro micro brewery business providing out-of-date retro beers for specific concessionaires. The brewery had renovated its in-house tavern and it was now a popular meeting place for the younger Utica area crowd.  Big sellers for this operation were all associated with New York City baseball teams, Ballantine Ale for the Yankees, Rheingold Beer for the Dodgers and Knickerbocker Beer for the Giants.

After his vending machine lunch, Brendan started his own research.  The massive database of text messages was too imposing for systems administrators like Brendan to search.  Poorly constructed searches adversely affect the performance of the texting services provided by Verizon.  But small controlled searches can go unnoticed by performance monitors and are only found after the fact if there is a reason to do a use audit of the system.  Administrators were not to seek and read text messages unless authorized.  Now Brendan had carte blanche to search the database.  Edna had given him a list of the cell phone numbers of each Verizon employee located in Utica.  The first number Brendan searched was 315-555-4589, Sandra Blumberg’s cell phone number.  Limiting his search to the past month, Brendan was soon looking at a list of 789 text messages.  He sorted the messages by the cell number of the other texting partner and found over two hundred to 315-555-0231 which he knew belonged to Janice Fanelli.

315-555-4589: GF, WHAT ARE YOU DOING 2NIGHT? ##
315-555-0213:  NIFOC, SOME GAMING. ##
315-555-4589:  NASTY. IS ADONIS THERE? ##
315-555-0213:   NW. HE IS AT THE UC TAVERN WITH WILL AND JIM. WANT TO COME OVER? I’LL DRESS :) ##
315-555-4589:  OK SEE YOU IN 15 ##

The thought of Janice Naked In Front Of Computer was exciting enough, but for Sandy to reference him as Adonis was beyond the scope of possibility.  The tagline of ‘Adonis’ might be the height of sarcasm.   This thought quickly brought Brendan back to reality.  Another message cast a ray of hope for Brendan.

315-555-4589:  GF, GOT A MINUTE? ##
315-555-0213:  FOR U ANY TIME U NEED SANDY ##
315-555-4589:  R THERE ANY GD MEN IN UTICA. ##
315-555-0213:  ANOTHER BAD DATE ##
315-555-4589:  DISASTER ##
315-555-0213:  I’LL COME OVER, WE CAN TALK ##
315-555-4589:  GR8.  I HAVE TISSUES AND CHARDONNAY ##

That was enough for now.  Brendan knew he had to start expanding his search and made a list of key words including: network, database, search, money, meeting, performance, dangerous …  He planned to pass this list onto Sandy and ask her to run it against all the telephone numbers on the list he also provided.  He called Sandy and Dharmesh and set up a meeting at the Utica Club Tavern for four o’clock the following Saturday. Ah, his first date with Sandy.  Ugh, his first date with Dharmesh.  Friday afternoon Brendan saw Dharmesh at their shift change.  He confirmed the Saturday meeting and verbally explained the first task that he wanted Dharmesh to tackle.  He would not see Sandy until the Saturday meeting.

Two hours before the team’s first meeting, Brendan was in the kitchen mixing a protein shake.  Janice was just up and showered and asked Brendan to sit at the table with her for a minute.  “Brendan, September is going to be my last month in the apartment.  I just put a down payment on a condo over at the Beaver Valley Golfing Community.  I move in the first of October.  Sorry to spring this on you like this.” 

Brendan was glad to be sitting down.  The thought of not having someone to share his rent was the first thing on his mind, but wondering how Janice who cannot be making any more money than he was buying a condo had his head a twirl. “A condo? In Beaver Valley?  That sounds so plush.  Did you hit the Mega Millions?”

Janice shook her head, “No, I have just been watching my nickels and dimes and I think investing in real estate at this time makes sense for me.” 

“I wish you the best of luck.  I am having a hard time investing in lottery tickets, no less a new house.  Any ideas on whom I can get for a new roomie?”
 
“Sorry Brendan, I know this stinks and I should have given you more notice, but things just happened.  I will give the new roommate question some thought and get back to you.”

Brendan was taken aback and somewhat pissed that he did not get more warning from Janice about this life changing move.  He made a mental note to review more of her text messages to see just how spur of the moment this condo purchase was for Janice. 

When Brendan arrived at the tavern, he noticed that Dharmesh was already sitting at a table with a large manila folder next to his glass of beer.  Just as he arrived at the table, he spotted Sandy.  She was wearing tight fitting pink Capri pants and a white halter top.  She, as always, looked stunning.  Brendan had no recollection of what, if anything, Dharmesh was wearing.  They both waved her over to the table and quickly ordered three more beers.  Brendan recommended that they set aside this time every Saturday to meet.  If additional time together was required, any of them could call a meeting.  Finding time other than a weekend will be difficult, since each works a different shift at Verizon.  They also agreed that there will be no email or texting communications about the project.  Brendan spoke, “It is my impression that Edna believes that someone on the inside at Verizon is very involved in this issue.  I have to agree with her, since the security on our systems is truly A1.  Someone probing our database from the outside will surely show up on one of our periodic intrusion tests.”  He pulled out his own manila folder and handed it to Sandy, “Here is a list of all the cell phone numbers for our Verizon workers.  I also included a long list of key words that might be associated with suspicious behavior.  Can you use the AI program to run against both of these lists?”

Sandy answered, “I will do it first thing Monday afternoon.  Is it alright if I add some additional words to the list?  Anyway we can find out if any employees have a non-work cell phone and can we get the cell phone numbers for their significant others?”

Brendan lamented wishing he had a significant other.  “Yes and yes.  I will get those for you early next week.”  “Dharmesh, what is in that large pile of papers you have there?”

“I have already associated every poor performance period for the past six months with any work submitted by the database administration team, any regularly scheduled database queries and any searches that can be initiated by the accounting department.  I am unhappy to report that most of the poor performance periods do correlate with known database inquires.  I will continue to look into those that do not correlate.  Perhaps when Ms. Blumberg has finished her work we can look more closely at the one thousand or so unidentified problem areas.”

Brendan rocked back on his stool, “One thousand, I thought you had things narrowed down?”

“Oh I do, I have already eliminated six thousand five hundred and twenty-eight poor performance periods.”

Sandy interjected, “That does make our work easier Dharmesh, and please call me Sandy.”

“Yes, Miss Sandy.  You should both know there is another area that troubles me deeply.  Edna told us not to look there, but I fear we must.”

Dharmesh then shared some details about the forbidden time period between 1:00 AM and 2:59AM each day.  Each day at exactly 1:00.00AM performance drops noticeably.  Four days out of seven the performance is degraded until exactly 2:59.59AM.  The other days the drop in performance stops at any time up to thirty minutes before 3:00AM.  That was until about two months ago.  Since July 15th, the performance remains poor right up to 2:59.59AM each and every day.
Dharmesh stopped to ask, “This is not strange? What could do this and why is there this change the past six weeks?”
Sandy spoke, “Perhaps there is a maintenance task going on during this time or… No, we are the system administrators; we have to know if there is scheduled maintenance.  And why was Edna so secretive and abrupt about these two hours.  She makes it sound like a state secret.”

Brendan mused; it probably was a state secret.  He more and more liked his Homeland Security theory.  At this moment, he wished Janice was part of the team.  Her specialty was network administration.  She of all the people save her partner and her supervisor had to know if there was data or access granted any government agency.  But he was sitting at the table with all the resources at his disposal and three of the four people he can trust on this project.  Janice was not one of those people.  Brendan ordered one more round of beer and some chicken wings.  They at least could enjoy the fruits of their expense account.  Brendan focused the next thirty minutes on Sandy and if he was not mistaken, she seemed to enjoy his attentions.  Dharmesh was busy texting continuously with who knew who, and in what language?

The next week each team member was busy at their personal piece of the puzzle.  Dharmesh stayed a little late after his shift and asked Brendan if he could have a quick work with him in the break room.  It would not take long.  Dharmesh reported that there were no database queries running against the database during the forbidden hours.  If he had to guess (Dharmesh’s guesses are usually money in the bank) was that someone was ‘merely’ reading from the database at that time.  Since the read was at a steady state for one hundred and twenty minutes, he believed someone was copying raw records from the database.  On Tuesday Sandy called Brendan and asked if they could have breakfast together after her Wednesday morning shift, “Café Utica at eight twenty, sure thing.”

At the Café, Sandy reported that she has found some suspicious patterns in some of the texting conversation the artificial intelligence algorithm has already searched.  She has refined the key word list and added several additional financial terms.  She has noted this search refinement has yielded an abnormally high number of text session from the 513 and 859 area codes.  She asked Brendan, “Can I get Dharmesh to help me narrow down these messages.  There are thousands of them and finding ones that might be pertinent is like opening oysters looking for pearls.  Dharmesh might be able to find a way to do this much more efficiently.  We might also need help from Edna and the Verizon security team.  If you give us the OK, we will let you know by Friday what other help we need.”

“I will speak to Dharmesh tomorrow when I come to work.  I will prime Edna on getting the security help.  I will also press her a bit about the one AM to three AM time period.  It looks like we cannot ignore this time period.  We should have breakfast more often, I am enjoying this.”

“Are you flirting with me Mr. Parker?  If so, please continue.”

That brought a warm feeling to Brendan’s loins, he continued, “Sandy, did you know Janice is moving out?  She says she has purchased a condo at Beaver Valley.  That area is quite pricey, isn’t it?”

Sandy paused, not wanting to violate any confidences and then added, “We have not seen that much of each other the past few weeks.  She has been awful busy.  Buying a place might be the thing occupying her free time.  I kind of miss her company.  But, you are right, Beaver Valley is expensive.  You have to get home and get some rest.  Thanks for breakfast. Bye”

“My pleasure, see you soon.”

Dharmesh had called Brendan early on Saturday afternoon and asked if they can change the meeting time until four thirty.  Brendan said, “No problem Dharmesh, get there when you can.”  The idea of spending a half hour alone with Sandy was no hardship for Brendan.  He arrived a few minutes early and was surprised to see Sandy already at a table.  She was dressed in a red and white checkered blouse with white short shorts.  Her hair was done up in a rather retro style that Brendan just could not place.  As soon as Brendan arrived she took his hand and led him over to a section of the room dedicated to the Miss Rheingold contest.  From the years 1942 through 1964 the brewers of Rheingold beer held a month contest to elect the Miss Rheingold girl of the month.  Local New Yorkers filled in and mailed hand checked ballots to the brewer each month.  At the end of the year, the public would then vote for a Miss Rheingold for the year.  This was quite an honor for any New York girl.  While still holding Brendan’s hand, Sandy stood still in almost a pose near the row of pictures listing the yearly winners of the Miss Rheingold girls.  Brendan almost gasped as he looked up at the 1964 winner and swore he was looking at Sandy.  In fact both Sandy and the winner in the picture were identically dressed and it now was clear why Sandy’s hair looked different.  The picture was captioned Brenda Weiss, Miss Rheingold of 1964.  Sandy said, “This is my Mom!  She was a student at Barnard College in the sixties and entered the contest.  Pretty, wasn’t she?”

Soon Brendan realized his mouth was agape.  He looked at the picture and then at Sandy.  He immediately wondered if human cloning was possible or perhaps Sandy’s father had no significant genes.  The two women were dead ringers.  “Pretty, she is a knockout.  Can you get me a date with her?  Ouch, ouch, I was just kidding.  Stop hitting me.  Your resemblance is uncanny.  If the contest was still in place, you would be Miss Rheingold of 2009.  Wow.”

Over on the other side of the room was Dharmesh waving his arms and calling their names.  Sigh, it’s back to business.  Dharmesh was excited.  He said he was late because he woke up at three this morning and went in to work to run some advanced queries he had developed.  He had the results and was eager to share them.

Dharmesh started, “I am certain there are bad people in Cincinnati and some in New York City whose names should be given to the SEC.  I believe they are using text messages to get insider information on pending leveraged buy outs, mergers and acquisitions.  I am not so sure about the people in New York City, they just might be stupid but honest people.  But those in Ohio are bad.”

Dharmesh went on for twenty minutes before either Brendan or Sandy could ask any questions.  He was apparently able to mine data from conversations originating from workers at Merrill Corporation, a printing and internet company that handles merger and acquisition activities for many global companies; that on surface was nothing but when many text messages are agglomerated they give very good indications of pending M&A deals.  None of the individual text messages is in itself incriminating, but using artificial intelligence and looking at hundreds if not thousands of these “innocent” messages the principals and some of the terms of the pending deals could be figured out.  This information was worth millions when carefully planned trading was done on the deal participants’ common stock.  Text messages complaining of working late, missing happy hours, numbers of documents that needed to be printed or scanned, waiting for deliveries from London or Copenhagen, long conference calls with Singapore were all snippets of information that could help identification of the principals involved and the scope of the pending deal.  As far as Dharmesh could determine, there were also other people in the Cincinnati area that seemed to be celebrating some victories but were very careful in not disclosing the nature of the actual victory. They did include detailed descriptions of the nature of their celebrations.

When Dharmesh needed a gulp of beer, Sandy quickly asked, “Dharmesh, but we did not find anyone making queries against our database from either inside or outside of Verizon.  How can this be?”

“Miss Sandy, not against our copy of the database, but do we know if anyone else has a copy or copies of our database?  Brendan, we have to meet with Edna and share this news.”

“I agree, Dharmesh, but there is one more piece of work we need to do.  There has to be someone inside the Verizon family that is a part of this scheme that is providing access to our data or they are getting into another authorized copy of the database we do not know about.  What can we do to find out more about this?”

“That will be very hard. I do not know where and how to begin.”

The three ordered burgers and a pitcher of Rheingold beer in honor of Brenda Weiss.  Brendan promised  Sandy and Brendan he would approach Edna Monday afternoon about a meeting between the four of them.

When Brendan got back to the apartment, Janice was sitting in the living room watching TV.  “Where have you been?  You seem to have a standing date Saturday afternoons?”

” I met some friends over at the Utica Club Tavern.  We had some beers and an early dinner.  Nothing special, do you have any roommate suggestions yet?”

“What about Sandy Blumberg, she mentions your name once in awhile.  I know she is a little stretched paying for rent at her apartment.  And believe me, this place is a real step up from her place!”

“Thanks, I like Sandy.  I will ask her about it.  You know Janice, you Sandy and I all make the same amount of money more or less.  I am just amazed you are considering purchasing a condo on our salaries.  Who would give any of the three of us a mortgage?  Did your rich uncle die?”

“Good guess, actually a maternal aunt of mine in Villa Hills Kentucky just across the river from Ohio passed away and left me some money.  If you remember I had to make several weekend trips to that area late this June and early July.  Almost all of my mother’s family lives in the area.   I have several cousins in the area who are doing very well.  I thought it was time I stepped up my life style a bit.  That is hard to do in Utica!  Hopefully, I can afford the place in Beaver Valley.”

Monday, Brendan scheduled a lunch meeting with Edna for Wednesday at noon.  Tomorrow Brendan was going to come in on the day shift and meet with Verizon security experts from headquarters in New York City.  Monday afternoon, Brendan faxed a list of all the cell phone numbers Dharmesh had located in the Cincinnati area that included both the 513 and 859 area codes.  He asked if the security team can match names with those numbers.  If the phones were corporate numbers, that will be even more help in the investigation. Still, Brendan thought he was missing something.  He walked into Edna’s office and asked if they could speak for a few minutes.

“Edna without naming names or agencies, does Verizon provide our databases to other parties?  If so, how is it done?”

“All I can tell you is that we follow all federal laws and all executive directives.  If the government wants information we have and has the legal rights to the information, we will provide it.  If that information helps in our security, we provide it very willingly.”

“So it would not be unfeasible that information from our database was transferred to the government on a regular basis.”

“That sounds feasible to me.”

“But Edna isn’t it odd that the randomness in the time it takes to make that transfer has suddenly changed the past six weeks?”

Edna stood up at her desk, “It has?  Whey wasn’t I told?”  She was fuming.

“Why weren’t you told, Edna no one on the team knew there was data being transferred?  Remember, those two early morning hours were out-of-bounds to our investigation.  Let’s pick this up at tomorrow’s lunch meeting.”

That night Brendan reviewed all the information the team had gathered.  He also started to review the spreadsheet the Verizon security team had sent him in an overnight package with the list of names and companies associated with the cell phone numbers Dharmesh had identified in the Cincinnati area.  Nothing was out of the ordinary except for a high correlation of First Third Bank Blackberries and the list of suspected cell numbers.  He finally shut off the light and went to sleep.  He was up early, but did not have to go to the office until eleven that morning.  He was sitting at the kitchen table when Janice walked in.  He offered her a cup of tea, chamomile, which she gladly accepted.  He politely asked Janice questions about her aunt.  It seems Aunt Mildred had six boys of which three were bankers like their father.  He was a vice president of the Third National Bank in Cincinnati.  He had done well and so were his Irish boys.  The family name was Farrell.  One of the other boys was an investment banker and the last two were partners in a corporate law firm.  Yes the Farrells had done very well.  Janice was apparently the daughter Aunt Mildred never had.

Today was reckoning day.  The meeting was held at the Holiday Inn on Eire Boulevard in the heart of decaying Utica New York.  Edna welcomed everybody and introductions of all in attendance were completed in the first five minutes.  Brendan, Dharmesh and Sandy moved to the front of the room and attached Dharmesh’s laptop to the Smart Board provided by the hotel conference staff.    It took nearly thirty minutes for the investigative process to be explained and another twenty minutes to explain the results to Edna and the security bigwigs.  Brendan got very nervous at the silence in the room.  They had not been asked any questions.  Finally, the Senior VP of Security asked Brendan if any of the names or companies they had sent to him correlated to any Verizon employees.  Brendan said he found no connection.  He did point out that there are high suspicions that personnel at Fifth Third Bank are involved, but there was no smoking gun in any of the thousands of messages they had reviewed both by eye and using the AI program.  Dharmesh stood up and asked if he could pose a question to them.  Brendan quivered.

“Mr. Preston, sir; is there any reason you know of that would explain that during the past six weeks the randomness of the time spent transferring data from our database to wherever had disappeared?”

Preston shot a glance at Edna and she just shrugged her shoulders.  “That fact was just made available to me yesterday.  I made inquiries through channels but have not heard back as of this morning.”

Jim Preston recommended a recess and told everyone to reconvene back at the Holiday Inn at three o’clock.  The security executives went to their rooms with their laptops and cell phones.  The Utica team headed back to the office.  Little was said, and it was very evident that Edna was on pins and needles.  Brendan was thinking separation was more likely than a promotion.  Dharmesh and Sandy went off to see it they had missed something. 

Brendan was totally deflated.  He could do nothing but stare ahead into a blank space inside his mind.  He longed again for those slow periods when all he had to do was sit, search and read the sex fanned text messages that were imbedded in the huge texting database that was at his constant disposal.  Just a couple of weeks ago this activity had taken him the titillating Board Room sight of a naked woman.  When was that?  Brendan sat up and activated his keyboard.  He remembered the incident was at an improbable time like three in the morning.  He then remembered the phrase “buck naked”.  He wrote a quick query:  SEARCH for “BUCK NAKED” BETWEEN 01092009:0250 and 30092009:0330.  In seconds there it was:

859-555-7732:  HONEST TO GOD, SHE WAS BUCK NAKED ##

Brendan then went into the full database at this point in time to see if he could recreated the entire conversation.  He wanted all the salty details. In the next fifteen minutes here is what he reconstructed from this three way texting session:

513-555-8754:   HI CUZ, WE ARE CELEBRATING.  ##
859-555-7732:   THIS WAS OUR BIGGEST PAYOUT YET.  ##
315-555-0213:   U COULDN’T WAIT FOR ME 2B THERE? ##
513-555-8754:   NO AND GUESS WHOS GIRL FRIEND WAS WITH US?  ##
315-555-0213:    NOT THAT BLOND FLOZZY.  ##
859-555-7732:   WE WENT TO THE BANK AND ENDED UP IN THE BOARD ROOM. ##
315-555-0213:   WITHOUT ME, UR A SCUZ.  ##
513-555-8754:  NEXT THING I KNOW, STELLA HAS ALL HER CLOTHES OFF. ##
513-555-8754:  OMGYG2BK ##
859-555-7732:  HONEST TO GOD, SHE WAS BUCK NAKED ##
513-555-8754:  IN THE BOARD ROOM?  I SO WISH I WAS THERE. ##
315-555-0213:  CARRY ON BOYS, I HAVE TO GO, TATA.  ##

Brendan stood up like he had seen a ghost.  He almost wished he had.  It was now two thirty.  He quickly dialed a number on his cell.

“Are you up and about?  Good.  I have a big favor to ask, can you meet me in the lobby of the Holiday Inn on Erie Boulevard at three o’clock for a few minutes.  It is very important.  Great, thanks.”

He then rushed to the parking lot to meet Dharmesh and Sandy.  While driving to the motel, he asked if the number 859-555-7732 was on his list.  It wasn’t.  How about 513-555-8754?  Yes it was and it was a number for a Blackberry at Fifth Third Bank.   Brendan blurted out, “I think that is good news for us, not so good for a friend of ours.”
Sandy looked at Dharmesh and squinched up her face as they pulled into the motel parking lot.  It was now almost exactly three o’clock.  Brendan looked at both of them, “Go ahead; I will be there in a couple of minutes.”  Just as they left down the hall to the conference room, Janice entered the front door and saw Brendan in the lobby.

“Brendan, what is this all about?  This is so not like you.”

“Bear with me Janice.  I need you to join me for a few minutes.  I am meeting with Edna and you can help me out.”

“Edna is here and she is meeting with you.  This better be good.”

Opening the conference room door and apologizing to all for being late, he quickly introduced Janice Fanelli to everyone in the room.  Edna looked puzzled and Jim Parker was slowly turning crimson.  “Mr. Parker, Janice is an employee here in our Utica office.  She is a junior network administrator.  I suspect she is a very competent network administrator and probably is very over qualified for the work she is doing.  Dharmesh can you load the slide that is on this memory stick and bring it up on the Smart Board”

Everyone’s attention turned to the slide now projected for the entire room to see.  Jim Parker’s face and neck were crimson by now.  Brendan turned to Jim Preston’s second in command. “Jonathan can you look up the names and companies associated with the three phone numbers that are included in the text messages on the screen before us?”
Jonathan Bane went to his laptop and retrieved this information:

 513-555-8754:   Sean Farrell of Fifth Third Bank in Cincinnati Ohio
859-555-7732:   Ian Farrell of Farrell and Farrell in Florence Kentucky
315-555-0213:   Janice Fanelli of Verizon in Utica New York

Brendan slowly turned to Janice who suddenly did not look to well.  “Janice do you know these two gentlemen?”

Janice spoke in the softest of voices.  Brendan prodded, “I did not hear that can you speak up?”

Janice repeated for all to hear, “They are both my cousins.”

“That was a pretty lurid text exchange you had and at quite a late hour.  Dharmesh tells me it was the same day that BP Gas announced the takeover of Conoco Oil.  Was that the cause of the celebration?  Please tell us all how you did this, you and your cousins.”

Janice broke down and told the entire story.  She knew of the transfer of daily information the Homeland Security database in Waco, TX.  She knew how the data was transferred and that it was impossible to intercept once the transfer was initiated.  The technology for this transfer was developed by the NSA and was minimally invasive to the Verizon system.  Janice realized the days where the full data transfer finished in less than two hours provided an opportunity to piggyback a transfer to another location.  After working with a covert database administrator, Janice found a way to stream a subset of the entire database to a hosted server that was owned by the Farrell and Farrell law firm.  That subset extracted financial information from a list of financial firms in a cleverly designed query written at the network level to hide the query and its activity from all security audits.  The query was almost identical in content to the one Dharmesh used to retrieve the information that had uncovered the operation.

That evening the police authorities arrested Janice Fanelli.  The next morning the Securities and Exchange Commission security team rounded up the Farrell brothers and charged them with several incidents of insider trading.  Edna was on cloud nine and Jim Preston was a hero down at corporate headquarters.  Brendan knew his promotion was set.
Edna told Brendan, Dharmesh and Sandy to take the rest of the week off.  First order of business for the three of them was dinner at the Utica Club Tavern.  It must have been the Tavern and the beer that brought them the luck to solve this Gordian knot.  At the end of dinner, Brendan asked Sandy if she would like to spend the next few days at the Turning Point Casino Hotel in nearby Verona, NY.  She did and a wonderful time was had by all.

Now all Brendan needs is to find a new roommate, or has he?

End of story